Saruman saw Ron, sorrowing.
Ron saw Saruman see his sorrow.
Says Saruman: “See Sauron, man.
“Saruman is not the man for sorrow, Ron.”
Ron ran to Sauron.
Sauron’s eye saw Ron run.
Sauron’s eye stunned running Ron.
No more sorrow, Ron!
Bev Bivalve’s billfold.
Bev Bivalve’s boffo billfold.
Offal in its insides!
Offal in the billfold.
Bev Bivalve’s boffo billfold’s awful offal!
Mr. Tory Terry.
Tory Terry’s tribal.
And the tribal river? Terry!
The Terry River.
Tory Terry traipses on its tributary.
The Terry Tributary.
Tory Terry triumphed!
Try to traipse to the tribal tribute at Terry Tributary to honor Tory Terry’s triumph.
Reminder: Always speak my verse aloud.
Howe’s Wires: wire ware!
Rare wire ware.
Here’s where Howe’s is:
Howser’s Warehouse is where Howe’s Wires is.
(Howser’s Warehouse also houses
(Mausers, hawsers, howitzers—whereas Howe’s Wires
(Houses rare wire ware where they are.)
How’s Howser’s warehousing?
How’s Howe’s wire housings?
How rare are Howe’s rare wire wares?
Wherefore care we?
Cathy’s Cathay Cafe.
How do you do?
One or two?
(One will do.)
What we do is
You choose chairs:
Basket shape or casket shape?
Geffin (guest), casket-sat, coughin’.
Right on Cathy’s Cathay Cafe’s coffin!
Geffin often sat, coughin’, sippin’ coffee—
Geffin, guest, sat coffin-coughin’, feting toffee coffee in Cathy’s Cathay Cafe.
Burgess. Johannes Burgess.
Burgess: a burgher
In Hamburg, no less!
Johannes Burgess, Hamburg burgher.
Burgher Burgess’ Hamburg hamburger.
Largest Hamburg burgher ’burger!
Barge on buglers, burgle bugles!
Finesse it, burgher Burgess, with Johannes-largesse!
Hamburg’s buglers, bugle-burgled, urge Johannes (burgher) Burgess, “Lease us largesse: Johannes’ finest, largest Hamburg burger.”
Did you give a herring her ring?
Beguile a bluegill?
Surge on a sturgeon?
Park a carp?
You shoulda’ had a shad.
Did you winnow a minnow?
Pick a pike?
Eye well a walleye?
Did you preach a perch?
Argue–or agree–a gar?
Rout a trout?
¡No mas salmon!
Did you tune a tuna?
(A cartoon tuna:
Did you tune a tuna ‘toon?)
Skewer a sucker?
Lean on an eel?
Cinch a conch?
Grip a grouper?
Shirk a shark?
Did you catch a lot of cachelot?
Are you cold?
Right wing rights get his cold shoulder.
Use a boulder:
“I arrest rights.
“I arrest right.
“I arrest a rightist’s rights.
“That’s my rite.
“My right rite.”
A bolder, colder Eric Holder
Lifts, aright, his own left shoulder
At the rites of right wing rights–
The one rite left for which he fights.
Learn ‘er, Lois!
Low is Lois.
“Trap tea party tardy!”
Libs: our ills, uber alles.
Liber-ills bill our ills.
Bilious bills instill all ills.
Fifth Amendment? Own it!
Fifth Commandment? Do it!
Tea Party: “Eliminate!”
Atticus. A test.
Atticus at a test.
Atticus attests at a test.
He tests and attests and he cusses.
“Curséd test!” he attests.
He cusses at tests.
Atticus curse-cusses, attesting at tests.
Atticus rests. Policeman arrests.
Arrest him he must:
Lest cursed Atticus, at rest, attest post-test curses.
Note: as always with my material, you aren’t getting the effect if you don’t say the words aloud.